I promise I was at three weeks of trail running yesterday. But man, did that dirt hill whoop me! I was gasping for air and yet determined to keep going no matter what.
It isn't even close to the hardest thing I did all day. A few hours earlier, I had an ultrasound to address some of the pain I had been experiencing. It doesn't take a rocket scientist to know something is amiss when there are a number of measurements being taken, and a black "anomaly" appears on screen.
It's a small fibrous tumor. It's completely operable, and so I am not worried whatsoever. Faith in God means that this too will pass and my faith is unshaken. Follow-ups are scheduled, and they will find in addition to the tumor, I am strong.
On a positive note, the scale showed a one pound drop in weight from my last appointment. It is a tiny win, but I will take it! I have worked off many calories to fight for that drop.
My long run on Saturday was over ten miles (including the walk earlier). I hope next week to have the time go under two hours for the eleven miles I have scheduled. Not sure I will hit the mark, but I am going to give it everything.
The unicorn hippity hop ball arrived. I love it so much. My toddler neighbors think it is the best thing on planet Earth. If you have never heard a child laugh while riding a unicorn, your life isn't complete yet.
So, keep going with your personal goals! Medical issues aren't going to stop or slow me down, and they shouldn't to you either. Run, swim, bike, jog, walk, do karate, or hop, but do something at least one hour six days a week. Don't strive for a "perfect" body size, shoot for a healthy body with a normal weight.
Have a great rest of your week!
DUE TO "SCRAPER" SCUM IN OTHER COUNTRIES, THE FOLLOWING NOTICE IS FOR
YOU: (C) August 12, 2014 United States of America. H.Jennings. Any
misuse or illegal scrapping of content constitutes copyright
infringement. Please email contact the web administrator for written
authorization to re-post or quote any information on these pages.
Tuesday, August 26, 2014
Wednesday, August 20, 2014
New Friends and The Scenic Tour
I joined a trail running group a few weeks ago. This was a good thing. I am a treadmill runner for the most part, but on the seldom "nice days" I will go trekking through our neighborhood. But, like Goldilocks, I don't like too hot, too cold, or too windy. So I get out like three times a year. Just kidding. But you get the idea.
The trail group forces me out of my comfort zone and straight up a cliff. Coach called it, "steep incline" but I think he will get a visual dictionary for Christmas. Here are a few other things that I didn't know when I started trail running:
1. "Jog up the hill/ mountain" This means walk at about 3.2 miles an hour for the rest of human kind. The coach goes a lot faster because he is some sort of mutant. Seriously, don't try to run.
2. "The trail is narrow." Translation, dirt trail used by deer. This is very narrow, and usually has loose rock and dirt. And whatever you do, DO NOT look down.
3. "Bring plenty of hydration." We went on a 500+ elevation climb (which wouldn't sound like much), but I guzzled down over 38 oz of water. Next time, I will fill up my Camelback (c) because I don't like running out of water. If you don't own a hydration pack, get one.
4. "Watch your footing." This means do not divert your eyes from the ground unless you are 100% sure you are not going to die/fall. If you want to see the deer someone pointed out, stop running. Or fall down. Your choice.
5. "I marked the trail with flour." *Sigh* This means he/she probably marked the trail, but stay with the leader just in case. If you are in a little group a bit further back, you might get lost. I mean, take the scenic route. We had more distance than the rest of the group, and found our way back (because someone found us, but you know, whatever). That flour dusting was about 20 paces further than the trail crossing. We could have probably seen it, but all four of us managed to miss it. Okay, three of us. One person said, "I think we went the wrong way." Her father may have taken pictures to document the group. At least I wasn't alone.
Making friends as an adult is more difficult than I anticipated. I have lived in the same area for 12 years. I am friends with my neighbors and I consider myself friends with the parents of my kids friends. But doing things outside my family, and neighbors was a BIG step. I had to join a group at church, and this trail group. Now, I have friends of my own. Which sounds weird.
I used to have a lot of friends. I wasn't "popular" but I had people I hung out with. I am still in touch with friends I made in Middle School. Once I consider you a friend, you are in for life.
My kids are both in new schools this year. We are all three in the same boat. Trying to find people that can relate to us, share our interests, and like coffee. I keep telling my kids to get out there and join people and if one group isn't right, then go do something else.
It takes work to meet new people but just remember, be yourself, and give everyone the same grace you want for yourself. In the end, you might find a person or two you will learn to appreciate and grow with. Good friends are out there, you just have to look.
DUE TO "SCRAPER" SCUM IN OTHER COUNTRIES, THE FOLLOWING NOTICE IS FOR YOU: (C) August 12, 2014 United States of America. H.Jennings. Any misuse or illegal scrapping of content constitutes copyright infringement. Please email contact the web administrator for written authorization to re-post or quote any information on these pages.
The trail group forces me out of my comfort zone and straight up a cliff. Coach called it, "steep incline" but I think he will get a visual dictionary for Christmas. Here are a few other things that I didn't know when I started trail running:
1. "Jog up the hill/ mountain" This means walk at about 3.2 miles an hour for the rest of human kind. The coach goes a lot faster because he is some sort of mutant. Seriously, don't try to run.
2. "The trail is narrow." Translation, dirt trail used by deer. This is very narrow, and usually has loose rock and dirt. And whatever you do, DO NOT look down.
3. "Bring plenty of hydration." We went on a 500+ elevation climb (which wouldn't sound like much), but I guzzled down over 38 oz of water. Next time, I will fill up my Camelback (c) because I don't like running out of water. If you don't own a hydration pack, get one.
4. "Watch your footing." This means do not divert your eyes from the ground unless you are 100% sure you are not going to die/fall. If you want to see the deer someone pointed out, stop running. Or fall down. Your choice.
5. "I marked the trail with flour." *Sigh* This means he/she probably marked the trail, but stay with the leader just in case. If you are in a little group a bit further back, you might get lost. I mean, take the scenic route. We had more distance than the rest of the group, and found our way back (because someone found us, but you know, whatever). That flour dusting was about 20 paces further than the trail crossing. We could have probably seen it, but all four of us managed to miss it. Okay, three of us. One person said, "I think we went the wrong way." Her father may have taken pictures to document the group. At least I wasn't alone.
Making friends as an adult is more difficult than I anticipated. I have lived in the same area for 12 years. I am friends with my neighbors and I consider myself friends with the parents of my kids friends. But doing things outside my family, and neighbors was a BIG step. I had to join a group at church, and this trail group. Now, I have friends of my own. Which sounds weird.
I used to have a lot of friends. I wasn't "popular" but I had people I hung out with. I am still in touch with friends I made in Middle School. Once I consider you a friend, you are in for life.
My kids are both in new schools this year. We are all three in the same boat. Trying to find people that can relate to us, share our interests, and like coffee. I keep telling my kids to get out there and join people and if one group isn't right, then go do something else.
It takes work to meet new people but just remember, be yourself, and give everyone the same grace you want for yourself. In the end, you might find a person or two you will learn to appreciate and grow with. Good friends are out there, you just have to look.
DUE TO "SCRAPER" SCUM IN OTHER COUNTRIES, THE FOLLOWING NOTICE IS FOR YOU: (C) August 12, 2014 United States of America. H.Jennings. Any misuse or illegal scrapping of content constitutes copyright infringement. Please email contact the web administrator for written authorization to re-post or quote any information on these pages.
Friday, August 15, 2014
Nothing Is Impossible... Including Unicorns
"Dad, how do you spell unicorn?" The memory flashed as I happened upon a piece of yellowing paper in Mom's big stack of stuff she kept, but didn't organize. On it was a list with a few things in my four year old handwriting. I wanted a horse, or a unicorn, and a new Light Bright.
The room was dark and Dad was watching football. I sat there making my Christmas list. "There are no such thing as unicorns." He said flatly. My feelings were hurt, but he didn't answer my question. "I know. I asked 'how do you SPELL unicorn.'" He rolled his eyes dramatically and spelled it out.
My cousin came over with my Great Uncle several days later and told me that unicorns might have been real, and then informed me that my Dad didn't know everything. He said he hoped I did get a unicorn. That was thirty years ago.
The thing about hope and faith is that it isn't in our time. God isn't Santa Clause. We sometimes get the miracles we need exactly when we need it, but for the most part, we have to just keep looking.
We bury our parents, our brothers, and friends. We wonder why God didn't heal them, or make things right before it was too late. The Bible talks about no less than a half dozen people being raised from the dead. Death isn't always the final say.
When Mom died, I felt heartsick. The landscape of my life was littered with painful loss. This seemed to be one more thing I would have to just work through. But then something happened.
"I will restore everything that has been lost." I heard the voice in my head as I picked weeds last summer in my garden. I thought it was odd timing, but continued the task at hand. It is in my garden that I pray, talk to Mom (or the memory thereof), and cry. That night, I read Job 42. Job had lost everything, and his friends were simply numbskulls. But they stuck around, so they were forgiven. Job went from nothing in sack cloth and ashes to more than double what he had when the book started. He had complete restoration. That day, in the garden, I had no idea how God would do that, but I determined to keep getting up after every loss. I determined to live like I was restored completely.
I started running because I believe that my body is a temple. I wanted that structure fit, whole, and healed. I wanted to have the ability to run the race the Bible talks about. I wanted the prize of the high calling. Even if that prize is simply a healthy life right now, that is more than enough. My faith is enough.
Yesterday, I ran three very long, hard trail miles. My legs are tight and sore. But I am doing something I thought was completely impossible a year ago.
The in-box yesterday had all manners of junk mail in it. I deleted, deleted some more, and unsubscribed until I happened upon something that made me laugh, and believe that God not only has a sense of humor, but He is keeping his word. "We want to send you at no charge a review of our new adult sized unicorn hopper."
I bounded up the stairs with a smile and told my husband, "I GET A UNICORN!" He started laughing, and told me it HAD to be a mistake. But I got the shipping notice this morning. My unicorn is on it's way.
Did I expect a unicorn? Oh, my no. How do I feel? More than less like this:
My kids have dared me to ride the unicorn over the finish line of the half marathon. My oldest told me, "People are cool, but are they cross the finish line of a half marathon on a unicorn cool?" He put the idea in my head.
Being a Christian doesn't mean that the road of life is ANY easier for me. It may even be harder. But my pastor's wife has the tag-line in her email that reads: "You are God's favorite." It's true. The Bible is clear that we ALL are blessed and HIGHLY favored. God WANTS us. He wants to show us how much more complete life is lived with him.
(c) August 15, 2014 H.Jennings NOTICE: this is private content. Scrapping content, borrowing, spinning or otherwise stealing my post material is copyright infringement. Don't do it. The United States of America has strict policies requiring those that want to reuse content to have WRITTEN consent of the author. So if you want to use this in any way, just ask.
The room was dark and Dad was watching football. I sat there making my Christmas list. "There are no such thing as unicorns." He said flatly. My feelings were hurt, but he didn't answer my question. "I know. I asked 'how do you SPELL unicorn.'" He rolled his eyes dramatically and spelled it out.
My cousin came over with my Great Uncle several days later and told me that unicorns might have been real, and then informed me that my Dad didn't know everything. He said he hoped I did get a unicorn. That was thirty years ago.
The thing about hope and faith is that it isn't in our time. God isn't Santa Clause. We sometimes get the miracles we need exactly when we need it, but for the most part, we have to just keep looking.
We bury our parents, our brothers, and friends. We wonder why God didn't heal them, or make things right before it was too late. The Bible talks about no less than a half dozen people being raised from the dead. Death isn't always the final say.
When Mom died, I felt heartsick. The landscape of my life was littered with painful loss. This seemed to be one more thing I would have to just work through. But then something happened.
"I will restore everything that has been lost." I heard the voice in my head as I picked weeds last summer in my garden. I thought it was odd timing, but continued the task at hand. It is in my garden that I pray, talk to Mom (or the memory thereof), and cry. That night, I read Job 42. Job had lost everything, and his friends were simply numbskulls. But they stuck around, so they were forgiven. Job went from nothing in sack cloth and ashes to more than double what he had when the book started. He had complete restoration. That day, in the garden, I had no idea how God would do that, but I determined to keep getting up after every loss. I determined to live like I was restored completely.
I started running because I believe that my body is a temple. I wanted that structure fit, whole, and healed. I wanted to have the ability to run the race the Bible talks about. I wanted the prize of the high calling. Even if that prize is simply a healthy life right now, that is more than enough. My faith is enough.
Yesterday, I ran three very long, hard trail miles. My legs are tight and sore. But I am doing something I thought was completely impossible a year ago.
I bounded up the stairs with a smile and told my husband, "I GET A UNICORN!" He started laughing, and told me it HAD to be a mistake. But I got the shipping notice this morning. My unicorn is on it's way.
Did I expect a unicorn? Oh, my no. How do I feel? More than less like this:
Being a Christian doesn't mean that the road of life is ANY easier for me. It may even be harder. But my pastor's wife has the tag-line in her email that reads: "You are God's favorite." It's true. The Bible is clear that we ALL are blessed and HIGHLY favored. God WANTS us. He wants to show us how much more complete life is lived with him.
(c) August 15, 2014 H.Jennings NOTICE: this is private content. Scrapping content, borrowing, spinning or otherwise stealing my post material is copyright infringement. Don't do it. The United States of America has strict policies requiring those that want to reuse content to have WRITTEN consent of the author. So if you want to use this in any way, just ask.
Wednesday, August 13, 2014
First Day, First Trail, and Anniversary
I thought it would be nice to follow up yesterday's post with something more positive, and more information about me. I will start with the good stuff first. This week has been awesome so far.
My oldest is eleven and a half. He is so smart; I am in awe. He started 8th grade yesterday. This is a new school, and he only knows a few people. I hate that he had to change schools again, but 8th graders aren't known for being the most understanding and kind people in the world. I didn't think a traditional middle school/ jr. high situation would be best for a young, brilliant kid. So far, I think my husband and I made the right call.
Speaking of my husband, this week, we celebrated 14 years of marriage. That is a lot considering how short relationships are these days. I got married when I was only 19 years old. It was insane. My mother told me so. She wanted me to wait a full year, but also didn't want me to have sex before marriage. We made the right decision. We only dated 20 weeks before we were married. Yes, I was a virgin on my wedding night. Not too many people can say that with pride. Not many people care. It isn't sacred in our culture, and that is sad.
Monday night, I put on my best running shoes and rode along with my trail running friend to my first trail running event in about 15 years. My trail running experience ended when I left Camp Redcloud in Lake City, Colorado the fall of 1999. I didn't think I would ever do it again, even though I loved it.
The air was hot and thick with smoke, but I wasn't going to chicken out. I have been training on my treadmill but the trails have rocks, which my treadmill lacks. My ankle tripped once, but I didn't go down. I am a well-conditioned klutz. I didn't fall too far behind at any point. I stayed within the first half of the group. It wasn't easy. I forgot how to run and drink water at the same time. That must have been hilarious for the people running behind me. I felt like a turkey looking up at the rain.
It was awesome. As we headed back, an osprey had caught a large fish in the river. The fish was so large the osprey struggled to get it into the air. I tried to get a picture, but the bird became indignant that it had an audience and finally flew away. The half dozen of us just stood there impressed we got to see something so amazing.
(This is a photograph of an osprey, not the exact one we saw, but I plan to use the experience as a way to convince my husband I need a new camera phone).
Half way into the trail, with the dust, smoke, and trees, it hit me, the trail smelled the same as in Colorado in late summer. I had to smile. That was a happy thought. Long before the beaches of San Clemente, my happy place was on the side of a mountain.
It has also been seven years since I struggled with my mental break. As I mentioned, I was diagnosed with Post Pardum depression in 2007, after giving birth to my youngest. He ate 20 hours a day. I co-own a business with my husband with no employees. I still had a job to do, even if I was plugged into a baby half the time. It will wear you down. I never recommend this to others. Always hire help when you have a medical procedure, or deliver a baby.
I didn't just "get over it." I had hours of counseling. I had to show my husband how to do parts of my job so I could rest when I needed to. I hid the shame of what I had done because I was afraid of what people would think. Some people are weak and need to break down others because they are broken themselves. Fight back with faith. Fight back with hope. Fight back with speaking up. They may talk about you behind your back, but you are above that now.
When I started shedding the "this is who I have to be" image and started being myself, and challenging myself to do new things, I overcame a battle with depression. I have been off anti-depressants for two months now. My doctor and I agree that I can go back on if I need to in the future, but my head feels bright, happy, and free.
I run when I start to feel down. I push myself beyond the 20, 30, 40 minute mark and before I know it, I have run close to two hours. The rush of endorphins is better than any drug on the market. My body feels the pulse of energy, and I can look at myself in the mirror and be satisfied (mostly) with what and whom I see. When I run, I force myself to see myself strong, beautiful, and full of life. When you are full of life, death will flee. When I run, I pray. My body HURT for the first four months I ran, and my lungs felt like I couldn't get enough oxygen. Now, it is a chore to get to the "peak" performance level, but once I get there, it is like I am given wings. God will give you the strength and courage you ask for.
Injuries, and body types may prevent you from running, but don't let it prevent you from getting moving. Start small. I would walk/ jog when I first got my treadmill for 20 minutes at a time. I couldn't do any more without my knee hurting. Finally, the knee healed and I picked up the pace to a brisk jog at 5 MPH. Last month, I was able to kick up the pace again to 6.5 miles an hour. Make no mistake, progress is slow.
Healing cannot be quick or it may not last. Go for slow, steady progress and refuse to let your mind think negatively. I say this out loud when those dark things threaten my progress, Philippians 4:8 "Finally, friends, whatsoever is true, whosoever is noble, whatsoever is right, whatsoever is pure, whatsoever is lovely, whatsoever is just- if anything is excellent or praiseworthy think on these things. Whatever you have received from my words, or seen in my actions, put it into practice. And the God of Peace will be with you." If you are not necessarily a Christian, then use the first part as a mantra. Do not allow one ounce of negative to be thought. You do have control of what you CONTINUE to think on. The dark thought may pop by for a visit, but show it the door by repeating the verse above. Then go for a walk, play with your kids, call your friend, or eat some expensive dark chocolate. Take captive your thoughts so they do not take you captive.
DUE TO "SCRAPER" SCUM IN OTHER COUNTRIES, THE FOLLOWING NOTICE IS FOR YOU: (C) August 13, 2014 United States of America. H.Jennings. Any misuse or illegal scrapping of content constitutes copyright infringement. Please email contact the web administrator for written authorization to re-post or quote any information on these pages.
My oldest is eleven and a half. He is so smart; I am in awe. He started 8th grade yesterday. This is a new school, and he only knows a few people. I hate that he had to change schools again, but 8th graders aren't known for being the most understanding and kind people in the world. I didn't think a traditional middle school/ jr. high situation would be best for a young, brilliant kid. So far, I think my husband and I made the right call.
Speaking of my husband, this week, we celebrated 14 years of marriage. That is a lot considering how short relationships are these days. I got married when I was only 19 years old. It was insane. My mother told me so. She wanted me to wait a full year, but also didn't want me to have sex before marriage. We made the right decision. We only dated 20 weeks before we were married. Yes, I was a virgin on my wedding night. Not too many people can say that with pride. Not many people care. It isn't sacred in our culture, and that is sad.
Monday night, I put on my best running shoes and rode along with my trail running friend to my first trail running event in about 15 years. My trail running experience ended when I left Camp Redcloud in Lake City, Colorado the fall of 1999. I didn't think I would ever do it again, even though I loved it.
The air was hot and thick with smoke, but I wasn't going to chicken out. I have been training on my treadmill but the trails have rocks, which my treadmill lacks. My ankle tripped once, but I didn't go down. I am a well-conditioned klutz. I didn't fall too far behind at any point. I stayed within the first half of the group. It wasn't easy. I forgot how to run and drink water at the same time. That must have been hilarious for the people running behind me. I felt like a turkey looking up at the rain.
It was awesome. As we headed back, an osprey had caught a large fish in the river. The fish was so large the osprey struggled to get it into the air. I tried to get a picture, but the bird became indignant that it had an audience and finally flew away. The half dozen of us just stood there impressed we got to see something so amazing.
(This is a photograph of an osprey, not the exact one we saw, but I plan to use the experience as a way to convince my husband I need a new camera phone).
Half way into the trail, with the dust, smoke, and trees, it hit me, the trail smelled the same as in Colorado in late summer. I had to smile. That was a happy thought. Long before the beaches of San Clemente, my happy place was on the side of a mountain.
It has also been seven years since I struggled with my mental break. As I mentioned, I was diagnosed with Post Pardum depression in 2007, after giving birth to my youngest. He ate 20 hours a day. I co-own a business with my husband with no employees. I still had a job to do, even if I was plugged into a baby half the time. It will wear you down. I never recommend this to others. Always hire help when you have a medical procedure, or deliver a baby.
I didn't just "get over it." I had hours of counseling. I had to show my husband how to do parts of my job so I could rest when I needed to. I hid the shame of what I had done because I was afraid of what people would think. Some people are weak and need to break down others because they are broken themselves. Fight back with faith. Fight back with hope. Fight back with speaking up. They may talk about you behind your back, but you are above that now.
When I started shedding the "this is who I have to be" image and started being myself, and challenging myself to do new things, I overcame a battle with depression. I have been off anti-depressants for two months now. My doctor and I agree that I can go back on if I need to in the future, but my head feels bright, happy, and free.
I run when I start to feel down. I push myself beyond the 20, 30, 40 minute mark and before I know it, I have run close to two hours. The rush of endorphins is better than any drug on the market. My body feels the pulse of energy, and I can look at myself in the mirror and be satisfied (mostly) with what and whom I see. When I run, I force myself to see myself strong, beautiful, and full of life. When you are full of life, death will flee. When I run, I pray. My body HURT for the first four months I ran, and my lungs felt like I couldn't get enough oxygen. Now, it is a chore to get to the "peak" performance level, but once I get there, it is like I am given wings. God will give you the strength and courage you ask for.
Injuries, and body types may prevent you from running, but don't let it prevent you from getting moving. Start small. I would walk/ jog when I first got my treadmill for 20 minutes at a time. I couldn't do any more without my knee hurting. Finally, the knee healed and I picked up the pace to a brisk jog at 5 MPH. Last month, I was able to kick up the pace again to 6.5 miles an hour. Make no mistake, progress is slow.
Healing cannot be quick or it may not last. Go for slow, steady progress and refuse to let your mind think negatively. I say this out loud when those dark things threaten my progress, Philippians 4:8 "Finally, friends, whatsoever is true, whosoever is noble, whatsoever is right, whatsoever is pure, whatsoever is lovely, whatsoever is just- if anything is excellent or praiseworthy think on these things. Whatever you have received from my words, or seen in my actions, put it into practice. And the God of Peace will be with you." If you are not necessarily a Christian, then use the first part as a mantra. Do not allow one ounce of negative to be thought. You do have control of what you CONTINUE to think on. The dark thought may pop by for a visit, but show it the door by repeating the verse above. Then go for a walk, play with your kids, call your friend, or eat some expensive dark chocolate. Take captive your thoughts so they do not take you captive.
DUE TO "SCRAPER" SCUM IN OTHER COUNTRIES, THE FOLLOWING NOTICE IS FOR YOU: (C) August 13, 2014 United States of America. H.Jennings. Any misuse or illegal scrapping of content constitutes copyright infringement. Please email contact the web administrator for written authorization to re-post or quote any information on these pages.
Tuesday, August 12, 2014
The Thoughts Alone
**Authors Note: I wrote this post four days ago. My husband said that it was depressing, and urged me to hold off posting. So I did. Then, last night, on August 11, 2014, Robin Williams ended his life. I decided to go ahead and post this with the hope and prayer that someone, somewhere, might be able to read this and get help. To that person, I want to say how blessed and amazing you are, NO MATTER WHAT. **
I saw the picture. She had a beautiful, happy smile, and then the video plea from her husband. I heard the words, "the kids think Mommy is on vacation." Then the words, "She was upset when she left."
My heart ached for her kids. I knew exactly what happened. Then the list of things she purchased came out a few days later, and my heart knew for sure.
Her family asked, "What could have driven her to this dark place?" Trust me, it's a slow, cold decent. You never planned on going down the road, but once you start to slip mentally, the final step to contemplating suicide isn't a stretch.
I have experience in this area. Unfortunately, I have had four members of my family, one uncle, three cousins, take their own lives. Then there was me. I broke. But in my case, I knew better than to be alone.
She was alone with her thoughts. When you get to the dark place, the demons are sure a hell of a lot louder than reason. "You will never make him/her truly happy." They whisper in a cold, malicious tone. "They will be fine without you." Continues the voices slightly louder. "What is there to live for anyway?" The answer can't be found before they become louder, and more demanding, "You do everything for them, and look what they have done for you!" These voices in your head didn't come in over night, but like most parasites they do not care about the host. They feed on insecurity, your thoughts, your motives, and your heart. No one can see them from the outside.
People going through the decline may say things like, "I am tired." "I wish things would change." "I feel like I don't have anyone." "I am stuck in this situation." At this point, friends and family should start to do something. Take them out for coffee and talk to them heart-to-heart. Watch their kids, or take them dinner. Remind them with notes, and calls that you love them and care about them. Tell them you NEED them to be okay. (This may make them cry or cause anger. That is sign things are much worse than they have said). Then help them get there. Talk to their spouse and let them know that you worry about your friends mental health. Most of the time, those who live with the person completely and totally miss the decline because it doesn't happen fast.
Catholic Relief Services, and Lutheran Community Services both offer low-cost and free counseling to those that can't afford traditional services. Get the names and phone numbers of local professionals and give them to your friend or spouse. Most people that suffer with depression, or are contemplating suicide will not ask for help. You have to give it to them.
Sometimes, they just need to sleep. Do whatever you can to let them rest. In my case, I had a newborn that ate around the clock, and I was literally worn out. I could not hear reason because I was so tired. When I see pictures of myself from that time, it hits me how bad it was. I gained a lot of weight. I looked gray and puffy. I didn't exercise. I would have given anything to have someone let me have a nap and a long walk. Maybe a pedicure. Okay, definitely a pedicure. Give them a pedicure. Unless it's a dude, then I would suggest letting them do something they really enjoy, like racing go-carts, or fishing.
TALK TO THEM EVERY SINGLE DAY. Do not have a "scheduled" time. But do let them know you will continue to call them and let you know you care every day. This should be enough to let the person know that someone is looking out for them. To a person on the edge, this could be the difference between life and death.
Finally, speak truth to them every time you touch base with them. I am a Christian, so I will tell even those that don't believe in God, "You were put on earth for a reason, and YOU are precious to God and Me." It's not perfect English, but it tells the person you care. Tell them, "I know you are hurting, and I want to be there for you." Letting them know they don't need to be perfect for you is a big thing.
Touched By An Angel may have seemed corny during the 90's, but it spoke truth on weekly basis to thousands of hearts. Every week, Roma Downy would tell people, "You are precious, and God loves you very much. If you could only see how high, and how deep His amazing love is, you would understand that your life means everything to the one that created you. He knew you before the moment you were formed in your mother's womb. He cares that you are going through this, and He wants to hold you. Won't you give God the chance?"
I hope that my struggle and the loss of my family was not in vain. If you are feeling helpless, hopeless and reading this touched off something you need to share, please get help. You are not alone.
DUE TO "SCRAPER" SCUM IN OTHER COUNTRIES, THE FOLLOWING NOTICE IS FOR YOU: (C) August 12, 2014 United States of America. H.Jennings. Any misuse or illegal scrapping of content constitutes copyright infringement. Please email contact the web administrator for written authorization to re-post or quote any information on these pages.
I saw the picture. She had a beautiful, happy smile, and then the video plea from her husband. I heard the words, "the kids think Mommy is on vacation." Then the words, "She was upset when she left."
My heart ached for her kids. I knew exactly what happened. Then the list of things she purchased came out a few days later, and my heart knew for sure.
Her family asked, "What could have driven her to this dark place?" Trust me, it's a slow, cold decent. You never planned on going down the road, but once you start to slip mentally, the final step to contemplating suicide isn't a stretch.
I have experience in this area. Unfortunately, I have had four members of my family, one uncle, three cousins, take their own lives. Then there was me. I broke. But in my case, I knew better than to be alone.
She was alone with her thoughts. When you get to the dark place, the demons are sure a hell of a lot louder than reason. "You will never make him/her truly happy." They whisper in a cold, malicious tone. "They will be fine without you." Continues the voices slightly louder. "What is there to live for anyway?" The answer can't be found before they become louder, and more demanding, "You do everything for them, and look what they have done for you!" These voices in your head didn't come in over night, but like most parasites they do not care about the host. They feed on insecurity, your thoughts, your motives, and your heart. No one can see them from the outside.
People going through the decline may say things like, "I am tired." "I wish things would change." "I feel like I don't have anyone." "I am stuck in this situation." At this point, friends and family should start to do something. Take them out for coffee and talk to them heart-to-heart. Watch their kids, or take them dinner. Remind them with notes, and calls that you love them and care about them. Tell them you NEED them to be okay. (This may make them cry or cause anger. That is sign things are much worse than they have said). Then help them get there. Talk to their spouse and let them know that you worry about your friends mental health. Most of the time, those who live with the person completely and totally miss the decline because it doesn't happen fast.
Catholic Relief Services, and Lutheran Community Services both offer low-cost and free counseling to those that can't afford traditional services. Get the names and phone numbers of local professionals and give them to your friend or spouse. Most people that suffer with depression, or are contemplating suicide will not ask for help. You have to give it to them.
Sometimes, they just need to sleep. Do whatever you can to let them rest. In my case, I had a newborn that ate around the clock, and I was literally worn out. I could not hear reason because I was so tired. When I see pictures of myself from that time, it hits me how bad it was. I gained a lot of weight. I looked gray and puffy. I didn't exercise. I would have given anything to have someone let me have a nap and a long walk. Maybe a pedicure. Okay, definitely a pedicure. Give them a pedicure. Unless it's a dude, then I would suggest letting them do something they really enjoy, like racing go-carts, or fishing.
TALK TO THEM EVERY SINGLE DAY. Do not have a "scheduled" time. But do let them know you will continue to call them and let you know you care every day. This should be enough to let the person know that someone is looking out for them. To a person on the edge, this could be the difference between life and death.
Finally, speak truth to them every time you touch base with them. I am a Christian, so I will tell even those that don't believe in God, "You were put on earth for a reason, and YOU are precious to God and Me." It's not perfect English, but it tells the person you care. Tell them, "I know you are hurting, and I want to be there for you." Letting them know they don't need to be perfect for you is a big thing.
Touched By An Angel may have seemed corny during the 90's, but it spoke truth on weekly basis to thousands of hearts. Every week, Roma Downy would tell people, "You are precious, and God loves you very much. If you could only see how high, and how deep His amazing love is, you would understand that your life means everything to the one that created you. He knew you before the moment you were formed in your mother's womb. He cares that you are going through this, and He wants to hold you. Won't you give God the chance?"
I hope that my struggle and the loss of my family was not in vain. If you are feeling helpless, hopeless and reading this touched off something you need to share, please get help. You are not alone.
DUE TO "SCRAPER" SCUM IN OTHER COUNTRIES, THE FOLLOWING NOTICE IS FOR YOU: (C) August 12, 2014 United States of America. H.Jennings. Any misuse or illegal scrapping of content constitutes copyright infringement. Please email contact the web administrator for written authorization to re-post or quote any information on these pages.
Saturday, August 9, 2014
Information EVERY new runner needs
I made the idiotic assumption that running required good sneakers, and the motion of moving your feet. I found out over the last five months it is SO much more than that. Here are the top ten things you MUST know to help you get started and be successful in your running quest.
1. KNOW THY FEET and what support you need! Sports Authority and Wal Mart stores have foot mapping stations to determine what kind of feet you have: flat, normal, or high arches. This information is critical to finding your shoe, getting the insoles you need, and being comfortable while running. DO NOT start a running program until you have done this. Period.
2. Don't be a cheap skate with your shoes! I know various stores sell "athletic" shoes for the $20.00 range, and that seems tempting since you are testing the water so to speak with the whole running thing. This is a mistake. I now have shin splints, and aggravated tendons, it is a regret that has had a lasting impact. Get good shoes to start with and then you will enjoy the journey. By the way, these shoes are going to be pricey. Look to spend about $60.00 to $150.00 depending on your foot type and running gait. I suggest getting fitted at a local running store then, grab another pair of the same type at www.sierratradingpost.com. Like them on facebook and be occasionally rewarded with 30-40% off offers! This is how I scored my Brooks shoes that are the best color and fit a girl could ask for. Not to mention, they were on sale with the coupon for only $55.00 normally, they are about $100!
3. Hydrate while you run. This is still a bit of an issue for me. I am going to have to get busy with my sewing machine, my ideas, and a bit of ingenuity. If I love my design I plan to sell them and patent the idea. Why? Because the little belts with water bottles are just plain sad. I drink so much water it is a little crazy. But the Camelback pack is a bit too large and heavy. Running with one of those handheld bottles is cumbersome. You see my issue. I am WAY too picky. Maybe I will have to just find the one I hate the least and go with it.
4. Be fitted for proper undergarments. Ladies, under wire sports bras are from the devil and should be burned. Find bra's that fit comfortably and properly (straps should NOT move). I have a very small chest, so my favorites are tanks with the built in shelf bra. Gals that are more blessed than I in that area should go to Victoria's Secret and be fitted with their amazing selection of high quality sports bra's. Again, this isn't an area where you should skimp.
5. Feel free to skimp in the clothing department. You can wear running shorts, or I love the "support" leggings. I buy the majority of my clothes from the clearance racks at Big 5, Sports Authority, Ross, and TJ Maxx. You should have at least three pairs of shorts/bottoms, and four shirts.
6. Log and know your run course. Check out google maps, or mapmyrun.com to find out the exact distance you have put in. Each week, add at least a quarter mile so you are gradually increasing your distance and endurance. I keep a notebook that tells every activity I do that counts toward fitness miles, like walking with my family, and trail running. It all goes in the book.
7. Know how many calories you need to go with the calories you are burning. Again, this one, I still have not mastered. I am about to pay big bucks for help. I have done everything my family practice doctor told me to do. (He actually said, "It's physically impossible that you can not be losing weight if you are exercising and watching your caloric intake.") I switched doctors and my new doctor has referred me to another dietician that will work with specific allergies and metabolic issues in play. I will report as things get better.
8. Stretch properly before you run! http://running.about.com/od/stretchesforrunners/tp/stretchesforrunning.htm This link has a lot of helpful stretches to get you ready to cruise. Your joints need to be properly stretched before they are exerted.
9. Take a friend with you! Again, learned the hard way. I should have had the buddy system at least once a week from the time I started, but I didn't think I knew anyone that ran. It wasn't until May, I met a lady at my church that I start running with this next week. People are there to support, encourage, and push you. Find friends that have more skills than you to glean advise from, and help you grow on your journey.
10. Push through the pain, but only to a certain extent. http://www.runnersworld.com/health/runners-and-blood-clots-what-you-need-know?page=single There are risks associated with running. Blood clots are an issue. Know the signs and symptoms and get help if you feel you are suffering. Only you know your pain threshold. If your leg is cramping up, stop for a few minutes, down some coconut water or Gatorade, and walk off the cramp. However, if the pain is sever and radiates in your chest, and upper arm-Stop immediately. Wait until your heart rate is down, then continue at a moderate pace. If the pain continues, call it a day. If you can't breathe, it goes without saying, head to the E.R.
Running is something that can help ease stress, strengthen and tighten muscles, and lower your blood pressure. Being a couch potato and calling Kinect games "physical activity" may seem like they are a better idea, but crossing a finish line in real life is one of the best things in the world. I was a dedicated walker until I entered my first 5K and found community, strength, and health. I love running now.
DUE TO "SCRAPER" SCUM IN OTHER COUNTRIES, THE FOLLOWING NOTICE IS FOR YOU: (C) August 9, 2014 United States of America. H.Jennings. Any misuse or illegal scrapping of content constitutes copyright infringement. Please email contact the web administrator for written authorization to re-post or quote any information on these pages.
1. KNOW THY FEET and what support you need! Sports Authority and Wal Mart stores have foot mapping stations to determine what kind of feet you have: flat, normal, or high arches. This information is critical to finding your shoe, getting the insoles you need, and being comfortable while running. DO NOT start a running program until you have done this. Period.
2. Don't be a cheap skate with your shoes! I know various stores sell "athletic" shoes for the $20.00 range, and that seems tempting since you are testing the water so to speak with the whole running thing. This is a mistake. I now have shin splints, and aggravated tendons, it is a regret that has had a lasting impact. Get good shoes to start with and then you will enjoy the journey. By the way, these shoes are going to be pricey. Look to spend about $60.00 to $150.00 depending on your foot type and running gait. I suggest getting fitted at a local running store then, grab another pair of the same type at www.sierratradingpost.com. Like them on facebook and be occasionally rewarded with 30-40% off offers! This is how I scored my Brooks shoes that are the best color and fit a girl could ask for. Not to mention, they were on sale with the coupon for only $55.00 normally, they are about $100!
3. Hydrate while you run. This is still a bit of an issue for me. I am going to have to get busy with my sewing machine, my ideas, and a bit of ingenuity. If I love my design I plan to sell them and patent the idea. Why? Because the little belts with water bottles are just plain sad. I drink so much water it is a little crazy. But the Camelback pack is a bit too large and heavy. Running with one of those handheld bottles is cumbersome. You see my issue. I am WAY too picky. Maybe I will have to just find the one I hate the least and go with it.
4. Be fitted for proper undergarments. Ladies, under wire sports bras are from the devil and should be burned. Find bra's that fit comfortably and properly (straps should NOT move). I have a very small chest, so my favorites are tanks with the built in shelf bra. Gals that are more blessed than I in that area should go to Victoria's Secret and be fitted with their amazing selection of high quality sports bra's. Again, this isn't an area where you should skimp.
5. Feel free to skimp in the clothing department. You can wear running shorts, or I love the "support" leggings. I buy the majority of my clothes from the clearance racks at Big 5, Sports Authority, Ross, and TJ Maxx. You should have at least three pairs of shorts/bottoms, and four shirts.
6. Log and know your run course. Check out google maps, or mapmyrun.com to find out the exact distance you have put in. Each week, add at least a quarter mile so you are gradually increasing your distance and endurance. I keep a notebook that tells every activity I do that counts toward fitness miles, like walking with my family, and trail running. It all goes in the book.
7. Know how many calories you need to go with the calories you are burning. Again, this one, I still have not mastered. I am about to pay big bucks for help. I have done everything my family practice doctor told me to do. (He actually said, "It's physically impossible that you can not be losing weight if you are exercising and watching your caloric intake.") I switched doctors and my new doctor has referred me to another dietician that will work with specific allergies and metabolic issues in play. I will report as things get better.
8. Stretch properly before you run! http://running.about.com/od/stretchesforrunners/tp/stretchesforrunning.htm This link has a lot of helpful stretches to get you ready to cruise. Your joints need to be properly stretched before they are exerted.
9. Take a friend with you! Again, learned the hard way. I should have had the buddy system at least once a week from the time I started, but I didn't think I knew anyone that ran. It wasn't until May, I met a lady at my church that I start running with this next week. People are there to support, encourage, and push you. Find friends that have more skills than you to glean advise from, and help you grow on your journey.
10. Push through the pain, but only to a certain extent. http://www.runnersworld.com/health/runners-and-blood-clots-what-you-need-know?page=single There are risks associated with running. Blood clots are an issue. Know the signs and symptoms and get help if you feel you are suffering. Only you know your pain threshold. If your leg is cramping up, stop for a few minutes, down some coconut water or Gatorade, and walk off the cramp. However, if the pain is sever and radiates in your chest, and upper arm-Stop immediately. Wait until your heart rate is down, then continue at a moderate pace. If the pain continues, call it a day. If you can't breathe, it goes without saying, head to the E.R.
Running is something that can help ease stress, strengthen and tighten muscles, and lower your blood pressure. Being a couch potato and calling Kinect games "physical activity" may seem like they are a better idea, but crossing a finish line in real life is one of the best things in the world. I was a dedicated walker until I entered my first 5K and found community, strength, and health. I love running now.
DUE TO "SCRAPER" SCUM IN OTHER COUNTRIES, THE FOLLOWING NOTICE IS FOR YOU: (C) August 9, 2014 United States of America. H.Jennings. Any misuse or illegal scrapping of content constitutes copyright infringement. Please email contact the web administrator for written authorization to re-post or quote any information on these pages.
Friday, August 8, 2014
Week Six Training Complete
When I started running in January, I could barely, and I mean BARELY jog a mile. Then by April I got to the three mile mark and I thought I was going to die. Light headed feelings with spots in my vision as I passed the 3 mile mark. Now, that's a warm-up.
For how many miles I log (over 20 per week), I should look freaking amazing. I should be able to slip into size four jeans like the celebrities that boast they only run for exercise. Nope. I have lost one pound in the last two weeks. I have altered my diet to include more protein and raw vegetables, reduced my sodium, consumed fewer carbohydrates, cut sweets to twice a week and halved the portion size, and cut out most dairy. THIS SHOULD WORK!
On that note, I would like to report that in case of famine, I will outlive everyone. My body holds on to fat cells like Donald Trump holds onto Casino's; way too long, and at a very high price. The fat says, "No, way, Lady. We have a long term relationship going here. Can't we go to therapy at TCBY's or something?"
The foot looks much better. The bruise from the chicken falling on it, has almost healed. If I didn't have fast reflexes, I could have broken my foot. I am lucky it just grazed it as it dove to the floor. Pain for a moment, but bruises last a while longer. Especially since I am so pasty white. I bruise like a peach.
I posted one long walk (3.75 miles), one mid-week run (4 miles), and today's plan is 6 miles. Saturday I will work up to eight miles. Monday, I will embark on a new, crazy adventure of a trail running group. My husband thinks I am nuts, and with all the smoke in the air, I am thinking he may be right. But, my mind is made up.
Joining the group was a commitment because it came with a fee. However, I need advise, because surprisingly, I don't know everything. In the matter of running, I know almost nothing. I realized this week, as much as I want to do this on my own, I need specific advise on how to place my feet when trail running, is a hydration pack better than a fanny pack, etc. These may sound stupid, but I am confused.
Until next post, have a great weekend!
DUE TO "SCRAPER" SCUM IN OTHER COUNTRIES, THE FOLLOWING NOTICE IS FOR YOU: (C) August 8, 2014 United States of America. H.Jennings. Any misuse or illegal scrapping of content constitutes copyright infringement. Please email contact the web administrator for written authorization to re-post or quote any information on these pages.
For how many miles I log (over 20 per week), I should look freaking amazing. I should be able to slip into size four jeans like the celebrities that boast they only run for exercise. Nope. I have lost one pound in the last two weeks. I have altered my diet to include more protein and raw vegetables, reduced my sodium, consumed fewer carbohydrates, cut sweets to twice a week and halved the portion size, and cut out most dairy. THIS SHOULD WORK!
On that note, I would like to report that in case of famine, I will outlive everyone. My body holds on to fat cells like Donald Trump holds onto Casino's; way too long, and at a very high price. The fat says, "No, way, Lady. We have a long term relationship going here. Can't we go to therapy at TCBY's or something?"
The foot looks much better. The bruise from the chicken falling on it, has almost healed. If I didn't have fast reflexes, I could have broken my foot. I am lucky it just grazed it as it dove to the floor. Pain for a moment, but bruises last a while longer. Especially since I am so pasty white. I bruise like a peach.
I posted one long walk (3.75 miles), one mid-week run (4 miles), and today's plan is 6 miles. Saturday I will work up to eight miles. Monday, I will embark on a new, crazy adventure of a trail running group. My husband thinks I am nuts, and with all the smoke in the air, I am thinking he may be right. But, my mind is made up.
Joining the group was a commitment because it came with a fee. However, I need advise, because surprisingly, I don't know everything. In the matter of running, I know almost nothing. I realized this week, as much as I want to do this on my own, I need specific advise on how to place my feet when trail running, is a hydration pack better than a fanny pack, etc. These may sound stupid, but I am confused.
Until next post, have a great weekend!
DUE TO "SCRAPER" SCUM IN OTHER COUNTRIES, THE FOLLOWING NOTICE IS FOR YOU: (C) August 8, 2014 United States of America. H.Jennings. Any misuse or illegal scrapping of content constitutes copyright infringement. Please email contact the web administrator for written authorization to re-post or quote any information on these pages.
Monday, August 4, 2014
Hurt Foot, Hot Days, and Frozen Review
I had to ice my foot last night, so running was out of the question. It involved frozen whole chickens landing on my foot and creating pain when I walk. It is the stupid things in life that make you slow down.
It has also been over 90 degrees each day for the last 20 something days straight. We are on track to break records, or tie them. Running in the heat isn't as much fun as it sounds.
My foot was fairly swollen after the 2.25 mile walk with my family, so for the first weekend in six weeks, I had to break from the "long run." I hate that. My body needs to pull it together.
So there I was on the couch with my foot up with ice on it watching Frozen with my boys for the first time. The first thing I need to say is, WHY DOES DISNEY KILL OFF PARENTS? Seriously though, think about it... At least one parent always dies. Bambi, Snow White, Finding Nemo, Aladdin, Little Mermaid, Beauty and the Beast, Lion King, Cinderella, and well... you see my point. So as we are watching this happy family in Frozen I said half sarcastically, "So when do the parents die?" My kids looked at me like I was nuts, until the boat scene and then the uber depressing song, "Do You Want To Build A Snowman?"
Before the comments section is several thousand comments thick with things like, "but it was the first Disney movie where a Prince wasn't needed..." Yeah. Got that. Girls, you do not need a man to save you, but I will tell you what, if you get a Prince, take it, because it's much nicer than being alone, or with you sister. Sisters can get a little annoying from time to time. Don't look at me like it's not true.
Did the movie have redeeming qualities? Sure. I am a little bit in love with Olaf. "This guy is out of his mind. I'll distract him, you run. Because I love you." [Pauses] "Why are you not running?" And the most charming line of the whole movie, "Some people are worth melting for." Oh, Olaf, you adorable wonderful, little allergy prone snowman you.
My kids favorite line was from the snowman as well, "Watch out for my butt!" Hilarious. Without Olaf, Frozen would have been anti-depressant worthy.
And if I had a dollar for every time I heard "Let it Go" before I actually watched the movie, I would have at least a hundred dollars. I have friends with small girls in the house that have listened to it ten times or more than that. Now that I have the lyrics and song in context, it isn't as bad, but still, please people, LET THE SONG GO.
I like the redemption at the end. I wish it was always that neat, and people would forgive, move on, and let the past stay in the past. However, forgiveness in movies and real life takes a lot of work.
DUE TO "SCRAPER" SCUM IN OTHER COUNTRIES, THE FOLLOWING NOTICE IS FOR YOU: (C) August 4, 2014 United States of America. H.Jennings. Any misuse or illegal scrapping of content constitutes copyright infringement. Please email contact the web administrator for written authorization to re-post or quote any information on these pages.
It has also been over 90 degrees each day for the last 20 something days straight. We are on track to break records, or tie them. Running in the heat isn't as much fun as it sounds.
My foot was fairly swollen after the 2.25 mile walk with my family, so for the first weekend in six weeks, I had to break from the "long run." I hate that. My body needs to pull it together.
So there I was on the couch with my foot up with ice on it watching Frozen with my boys for the first time. The first thing I need to say is, WHY DOES DISNEY KILL OFF PARENTS? Seriously though, think about it... At least one parent always dies. Bambi, Snow White, Finding Nemo, Aladdin, Little Mermaid, Beauty and the Beast, Lion King, Cinderella, and well... you see my point. So as we are watching this happy family in Frozen I said half sarcastically, "So when do the parents die?" My kids looked at me like I was nuts, until the boat scene and then the uber depressing song, "Do You Want To Build A Snowman?"
Before the comments section is several thousand comments thick with things like, "but it was the first Disney movie where a Prince wasn't needed..." Yeah. Got that. Girls, you do not need a man to save you, but I will tell you what, if you get a Prince, take it, because it's much nicer than being alone, or with you sister. Sisters can get a little annoying from time to time. Don't look at me like it's not true.
Did the movie have redeeming qualities? Sure. I am a little bit in love with Olaf. "This guy is out of his mind. I'll distract him, you run. Because I love you." [Pauses] "Why are you not running?" And the most charming line of the whole movie, "Some people are worth melting for." Oh, Olaf, you adorable wonderful, little allergy prone snowman you.
My kids favorite line was from the snowman as well, "Watch out for my butt!" Hilarious. Without Olaf, Frozen would have been anti-depressant worthy.
And if I had a dollar for every time I heard "Let it Go" before I actually watched the movie, I would have at least a hundred dollars. I have friends with small girls in the house that have listened to it ten times or more than that. Now that I have the lyrics and song in context, it isn't as bad, but still, please people, LET THE SONG GO.
I like the redemption at the end. I wish it was always that neat, and people would forgive, move on, and let the past stay in the past. However, forgiveness in movies and real life takes a lot of work.
DUE TO "SCRAPER" SCUM IN OTHER COUNTRIES, THE FOLLOWING NOTICE IS FOR YOU: (C) August 4, 2014 United States of America. H.Jennings. Any misuse or illegal scrapping of content constitutes copyright infringement. Please email contact the web administrator for written authorization to re-post or quote any information on these pages.
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